Funny software development stories

Teams use t-shirt sizes, the Fibonacci sequence, or planning poker to make proper estimations. A story should be sized to complete in one sprint, so as the team specs each story, they make sure to break up stories that will go over that completion horizon. This structure is not required, but it is helpful for defining done.

When that persona can capture their desired value, then the story is complete. We encourage teams to define their own structure, and then to stick to it. Understanding their role as the source of truth for what your team is delivering, but also why, is key to a smooth process.

Start by evaluating the next, or most pressing, large project e. Break it down into smaller user stories, and work with the development team for refinement. An inside look into secrets of agile estimation and story points.

Good agile estimation lets product owners optimize for efficiency and impact. Agile Agile project management User Stories. Max Rehkopf. Browse topics Agile manifesto. Sprint planning. Sprint reviews. Scrum master. Distributed scrum. Scrum of scrums. Agile scrum artifacts. Scrum metrics. Jira Confluence scrum. WIP limits. Kanban vs Scrum.

Project management intro. Epics, stories, themes. User Stories. Gantt chart. Program management vs. Product Roadmaps. Product Manager. Tips for new product managers.

Tips for presenting product roadmaps. How to prioritize features using NPS. Product analytics. Remote product management. Managing an agile portfolio. Lean portfolio management. Long-term agile planning. The chicken is just not going to be able to cross the road this month. Crossing requirements were due last Friday. She will have to take her place on the backlog. Maybe the chicken can cross the road in Sprint 9. Because I have three other business initiatives riding on the chicken being on the other side of the road that were supposed to start six weeks ago.

The question is why the chicken felt she had to cross the road. Because the requirements said so. The trebuchet was the most efficient method. The computer allows you to make mistakes faster than any other invention, with the possible exception of handguns and tequila. A computer scientist is someone who fixes things that aren't broken. The only thing more dangerous than a hardware guy with a code patch is a programmer with a soldering iron.

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning. The question of whether a computer can think is no more interesting than the question of whether a submarine can swim. Dijkstra I have yet to meet a C compiler that is more friendly and easier to use than eating soup with a knife. If debugging is the process of removing software bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes. There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third one works. It's only 1's and 0's. If you can't beat your computer at chess, try kick-boxing. I think there is a world market for maybe five computers. If you see a leak, take a dump. Both of the memory of course.

Me: Where can I download the latest release sw? We have a vast untapped pool of QA Engineers…. CEO: Lee! What are you doing in my liquor cabinet? Lee: I need to test how the app is going to behave after the user has had Tequila. Humor is not always appreciated — I once asked if the offshore development guys had a time machine that allowed them to go back in time and fix a bug before I raised it — if not then I did not believe it was fixed in their last release I was currently testing as they claimed — apparently they were not amused and I got told off by my boss who was trying not to laugh..

Why did you test it that way? The users should never do that. What did you do? Interviewer : What do you mean by Regression Testing? Interviewee: Testing an application again and again and again is called as Regression Testing. Interviewer: Only a mad fellow would test an application again and again and again!! QA Manager: But we are still testing and we are finding bugs. Director of Development: Yea, but the customers can find the bugs a lot sooner than QA. QA Manager: Oh yea…very talented Director.

This is real story. Developer proposes, Tester disposes — Padmanabhan Sundararajan. Today